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Its Tony’s reality. An alternative reality, open to all the faithful. A better, nicer, more benign and Christian reality than that inhabited by the punditteri, the Westminstrati, the Torytrots, the mediarati and other cynics including you and I. It’s Blairworld. Come right on in. In Blairworld New Kipling shoulders the White Man’s burden wherever President Bush tells him to, and preaches Boy Scout ethics to recalcitrant races, Mad Mullahs and Murderous Moslems, reinforcing them with bombs where necessary and keeping nuclear subs handy just in case the going gets rough.
In Real World those who pay the bills for regular wars wonder why. What does all this have to do with them?
In Blair world Young Lochinvar eloquently explains, convinces and answers the problems of the people. Unconvinced outsiders wonder if anyone’s listening any longer.
In Blairworld the mission goes on however many times the direction changes, from Making things better to a War on Terror, a War on Poverty, A war on Yobs and Yobbery, to Public Service Reform, to defeating Global Warming. In RealWorld confusion reigns about which is the war of the week and whether it conflicts with the initiative of the day.
In Blairworld the preacher extols the virtues of low taxes, globalisation, Private Finance and the rigour of the market. In Real world folk wonder why we’re still short of teachers cops and medics, why national champions are being taken over and jobs exported and why business cheats and fiddles, and showers bonuses and share options on its top people and P45s on its employees.
In Blairworld Tony does it all. MPs and Ministers are there to admire and applaud. Not to be listened to. Blairworld is Euroland, virtues extolled, importance hyped currency desireable. Someday.
RealWorld is British and sceptic. Why are the bills so high and what do we get out of it?
In Blairworld we love the bomb, nuclear power, the Big Four Accountancy Houses, God and home ownership, particularly in Connaught Sq. But don’t like the Labour party, the trade unions, critics and the increasing number of people who’ve been fired or let down.
Real world isn’t too bothered either way
In Blairworld New Labour marches towards its destiny as a party of permanent power, led by The Great Leader striding into the future. In Realworld limping into history. As soon as possible.
Here are two parallel realities, impossible to reconcile, which could run on on parallel lines until 2009 when realworld votes on Blairworld, or until the owner of Blairworld retires next year. What market then for the freehold on Wonderland, one careful owner, slightly soiled? Will anyone else have the eloquence, the vision, the mystic powers and the insulation from reality and the simple puff to keep the bouncy castle blown up? Enquiries to the agents Hill&Mandelson .
(Stolen from Maureen Dowd. Thanks)
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Hillary Clinton, advised by the cunning bill has found a new way round the Iraq problem which has divided the Democrats. Yes we agreed to the war because we were conned but its been so badly conducted with too few troops and no idea what to do that we can’t possibly support the Rumsfeld approach. It came a bit late to save Leiberman but it still leaves unsettled the issue of what to do now. Bush will cut and run as Nixon did. But not yet.
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Thursday l0 August Awake to a TV and radio panic. British security, those wonderful people who gave us Yellow cake (not Mr Kiplings- bought by Iraq), Tanks to Heathrow, Sarin poison plots in London and Manchester, the Forrest Gate raid which discovered only paedophile internet pix, (all announced with similar shock horror) have now given us a John Reid spectacular (Prezza excluded) carefully timed to let Tony get away to Cliff’s place on holiday.
A threat to blow up planes by mixing a peroxide cocktail on board. Instead of arresting blonds, 22 British Pakistanis bunged up. Raids everywhere, even High Wycombe. Flights cancelled, Chaos at British airports. Now US too. Passengers must take out false teeth and silicon implants and carry them on in plastic bags.
It’s all believed and taken very seriously here. TV correspondents praise the skill of our intelligence services and the phlegmatic courage of the Brits. My guess? Another false alarm. Suspects will be released. Charges will melt away but only after a few days of air travel chaos collapse of airline stocks and airlines moved a step nearer bankruptcy, a bigger win for Al Queida than a bomb would be. Well done Al.
But better let all that come out slowly. First Bush needs it to help Republican election prospects. Which Dick Morris says it will.
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After fifteen months of steadily raising interest rates the FED has decided that 5.25% is enough. US inflation is higher than ours but they see something we don’t. Recession is coming and the more the economy is clobbered with high interest rates the sooner it will arrive. British and European bankers, though in a worse mess and with lower growth are still hiking. Lord please give us a FED not the reincarnation of Montague Norman.
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Phone call from the Campaign Group. Will I sign the demand for the recall of Parliament. Its pure hypocracy. I’ll be in the Cook Islands. But I’ll blog therm a speech and come back in September, blaming airport delays
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Worried call. Did I know I’m the only Labour name on a far right web site. No I didn’t but its there because I signed the “Better Off Out” statement. That’s an obvious truth. We would be. So I’ll let my name stay there until someone proves the opposite to me.
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